6 Things I Stopped Doing in 2025
I have spent the past few New Year’s Eve parties wishing that, somehow, I would just be different. Now I see those wishes that I threw like seeds were not futile - each year, I got closer and closer to breaking the surface of the soil that was keeping me small.
I’m no longer only growing beneath the soil. I can feel the sun on my leaves. 2025 has been a sprouting season for me.
That doesn’t mean that there aren’t struggles; even a bud faces storms. But the storms can’t cloud the hope that I have felt, finally being able to see life above the soil.
I’m sure there are many things that have helped me emerge, some that I am not able to articulate, just yet, but for now, these are key aspects that have created the beautiful expectation that sprouting brings.
In 2025 I stopped…
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I know what you are going to say, “well - that’s basic.”
I hear your heart here, but do you have this mastered yet? I definitely didn’t and still don’t.
Caring what other people think is not all bad, it’s the reason we all have clothes on right now and that we don’t pick our noses. It is important to care about others and value their opinion, but when glances and glares weigh so heavy on you, that you don’t allow yourself to move toward the callings in your heart - that’s a problem.
I don’t want to become someone who doesn’t give a flying poop what anyone thinks.
But I do want to be someone who stays true to the integrity of my inner voice in all situations.
This year I have coined the term “Practing Publicly”. This term has served as my battle cry against the fear of what others think.
As I began posting more, making my coaching services available, and moving on from old projects in my life, all I heard in my head was “Who do you think you are.” “People are laughing at you.” “You look silly.”
I still feel this way every time I even book time on my calendar to work on my coaching business - “What will people think of me?”
The difference between 2024 Natalie and 2025 Natalie is I do that SHIZ anyways! I tell myself, I do not have to be perfect, I am just practicing publicly and that is beautiful.
This isn’t the final show. It is a dress rehearsal, so I don’t have to get it all right.
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I had long ago subscribed to a budget. Putting cash in envelopes and learning how to give each dollar a job description. This was essential to me gaining the financial discipline that our generation lacks.
Somewhere along the way, I developed a disdain for spending money and an arrogance towards those who did spend theirs.
I thought that I had to save my way to success and as harder times hit in our finances, I lost sight of how I could cease calculating every grocery I put in my cart.
I had focused all of my energy on cutting down (changing phone plans, bulk ordering, switching internet providers) that I forgot how capable I was of just making more money.
When I pivoted my mindset from what don’t I have, to what can I do, I started making $500 a month making sourdough bread and then I made $300 hosting a personal development workshop. That jolt of confidence opened up the floodgates of ways of expanding myself instead of stuffing my life into smaller boxes.
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Then came a moment when I asked my husband to take a load off of my plate and deliver my sourdough bread for me.
I told him that all of the instructions were in my notebook. I was grateful that he offered to help, but that was quickly followed by anger when he started making comments about how sloppy the notebook was and how he could not read it.
I looked at the notebook and started pointing out how it was obvious which name and address went with each customer etc.
Needless to say, I ended up delivering the bread myself and was humbled that my instructions were not obvious and many of them were wrong.
This led me to the second prong of this revelation. I need to dumb it down. If I want help and I want to NOT have to do everything myself, I have to keep things organized in a way that they would be intelligible to someone who did not receive a brain transplant from me.
If I want to have an assistant one day, my to-do list needs to be written in a way that they could pick it up and go.
When I ask for help making breakfast, is it actually clear what I want?
The more I analyzed this the more I realized that so much of my unhappiness stems from thinking that if people really loved me they would be able to read my mind and just help me.
What an unrealistic and unfair expectation to place on others.
I am altering that narrative to say, that people love me and want to help me, but they can’t read my mind. If I am clear and kind they will do their best to help me, and their willingness to try - even if they don’t do it as well as I would- is the purest love.
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No one wants to help a micromanager.
They are nags. They don’t trust you. They think they know best.
This criticism is coming from someone who just looked in the mirror and realized they have the disease.
HELP. I AM A MICROMANAGER. Or, at least, I was.
My constant thought was that other people were lazy, couldn’t be trusted, and didn’t know what to do; therefore, I did everything myself or nagged you until you did exactly what I said.
This provided me with ZERO joy, 100% irritation, and ZERO people who wanted to help me.
With this realization in check, I used practices I teach in my coaching sessions to rewire my limiting belief that others are lazy. It became clear that different thought processes come with different cadences. People just work differently.
I had to note that not everyone thinks like me and that is a gift.
That meant that when I was pacing around the house staring at something I wanted cleaned, I had to stop thinking that my husband was purposefully sitting on the couch because he was trying to irritate me.
I had to tell myself a better story and note that he wasn’t even thinking of the same thing I was thinking of. He doesn’t see the gap that I see and because he is a good person, if I ask him politely, he will help.
People want to help you, you just aren't asking, and if you are, you probably aren’t doing it nicely.
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I often have my clients do an exercise of signing their names with both their left hand and right hand.
It’s easy to see that your dominant hand produces a far better signature. Using your non-dominant hand can feel awkward and clunky.
I then ask them, “Wouldn’t it be silly to spend the rest of your life improving your signature on your non-dominant hand, instead of focusing on perfecting your signature on your dominant hand?”
For many of us, we spend our lives fixated on getting rid of our weaknesses instead of focused on fine-tuning our strengths.
Our talents are our God-given signature.
In 2025 I divorced constantly thinking of all the things I don’t do well and embraced acting in my God-given giftings: teaching, public speaking, leading, and being on a mission.
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I might be the only weirdo on the block who didn’t like finishing their to-do list.
Why you might ask? Because the idea of having nothing to do gave me more anxiety than having tons of things to do. Oh, yeah - just me haha.
If I got an idea I would wonder, “If I act on this idea, then I might run out of ideas”. For example, when creating a marketing plan for my social media I would avoid posting concepts because I thought that I would never have another idea as good as that one.
Holding on and waiting for perfection didn’t serve me; instead, I have found that God loves a cheerful giver.
The more you give away your thoughts and ideas and release them into the world, the more he multiplies them.
He is grateful that the idea He gave you is not falling on deaf ears. It was given to you to distribute! SOMEONE needs to hear it. That someone may not be one million followers but there is someone out there who needs to hear that idea you are sitting on and afraid to hatch.
Lori Gottlieb, a world-renowned therapist, says, “The opposite of depression is vitality”. Vitality, by definition, is the power-giving continuance of life, present in all living things (Google Dictionary).
To sprout is to be alive. Push past the surface. Practice publicly. Try something new. Living above the soil is scary, but man, the view is way better up here.
2025, I love you. <3
